Establishing the new routine

So day 1 of the new routine is here - and I am not sure I am going to work yet. I feel physically exhausted. I know part of that is the due to the drive back yesterday - but not all of it by a long way. Part of the tiredness is due to worry over how Edna's discharge is going to go. Also some of it is sluggishness due to yesterdays food and lack of excercise. I can still feel pie and chips sitting like lead in my stomach - pure imagination of course.

So 'tuning in ' I feel tired stiff and sluggish . Emotionally I am anxious and nervous about how the care package is going to work. And my main thought is about how Edna is reacting to the new care package. It doesn't really make sense for me to go to work. My mind wouldn't be on work and I would be more of a hindrance than a help.

I need to get back on yrtack with food and exercise. We did a lot of walking over the weekend , and until last night I was really pleased about food went. OK I was doing a lot more snacking than normal but I found that when I was fcaed with a meal, I could not eat everything I was given. I think dinner in the hotel on Sunday night was the best example of this. I left at least a quarter of the beef and didnt attempt to eat all the vegetables. OK I had desert and ate all of it - but the old me would bave eaten ALL the main meal.

Whatever else I do today - and it seems clear I am going to be spending a fair amount of time on Edna today - I MUST do something for me.and get myself back on track with food.

I have been sat staring at that last statement for about 20 minutes without coming to any decision about the specific action I ought to take. I cant think. Also in the back of my mind I know what I should do - go for a gentle walk round the park. The peace and fresh air will be good for me. But I can't motivate myself to move.

I have eaten. I grabbed a banana. I managed to eat it fairly slowly - but I satill feel hungry so I need to get up and get that organised. Hopefully once I start moving I will feel better.

I think today is going to be a struggle