To work or not to work

I am very unsure about going to work today. I haven't done anything physical this morning and I don't feel 100% but I am a lot better than yesterday....I think. But I am worried about getting a reputation for unreliability if I dont go in especially as I now have to leave at 1.00 next Tuesday. They are starting to discuss a care package for Edna after she is discharged and I have to meet the social worker at 2.00. But I will get a worse reputation if I make lots of mistakes because I am not feeling well. Maybe another day off won't hurt. I dont want to do anything to jeapordise them keeping me on after Linda comes back.

Food was a disaster yesterday. Illness does that to me. And this morning I am eating breakfast - but I am not really hungry. I feel bloated this morning. Thats my IBS playing up again. On the plus side I am eating slowly, and it is healthy ( one large shredded wheat with a peach and plain fromage frais)

Yesterdays dinner was healthy (chicken, rice and stir fried vegetables) I just didnt eat it slowly enough, but it was a smaller portion than I used to eat before I started following (or trying to follow) Paul's programme. But the choclate biscuits I ate during the evening were pure snacking. I wasn't really hungry - just 'fancied something'

I know the rules - I know they work - why can't I follow them????

OK you dont need to be a genius to work out I am highly stressed at the moment. I need to deal with that stress and get myself back on track. Will not going to work today cause more stress than it relieves or will a day off do me the power of good? Or will getting back into my routine increase my self esteeem and make me feel in control?

I dont have a clue what is going on in my brain at the moment - and I need to find out. How many of my worries are real and how many are imagination? My imagination is a useful tool - but is also my worst enemy at times when it runs out of control.

I will go and have a shower and see how I feel afterwards