Control

I think 'control' is a key word for me - along with 'persistecce' Trouble is 'control' has bad connotations as in 'control freak' but a lack of control leads to disasater as in a car out of control.

I identifed years ago that I need to be in control of my life . This means any situation where I cannot control what happens - as is the case with Edna - can lead to stress. But having the maximum control where I can makes me feel good and helps me cope with the stress.

That is why I am determined to be in control of my health and that includes managing stress.

At the moment my stress managment is pretty good - whihc is why I feel chipper this morning.

Food went well yesterday
I drank water
I excercised
I meditated before I went ot sleep
I slept well

This morning I put on the wieght loss CD and relaxed so deep;y I fell asleep and only woke as Paul counted backwards at the end. In fact I woke at the count of 4;
I have done a 20 inute workout - slowly eating a banana between excercises. (I wasnt hungry when I started then realised I was and fancied a banana)
I am sending ove to myself by doing this blog - any excuse to write!

There are times when I wish the weight was visbly dropping off me - but I do take some inspiration from a fictional heroine.

Susan Howatch (one of my favourite authors) wrote a story called ' A woman of Integrity' The woman of the title (Alice) is unhappy and overweight and has a huge emotional eating problem. She is given the chance of new life and along the way gains a lot of self esteem thanks to the people in her new life. She doesnt diet - but ends up losing weight and getting a life she could never even have dreamed about.

In the book one of the other characters (a clergyman who works in a healing centre )tells her ' Maybe you dont need to diet - maybe you need to change your lifestyle ' Could there be anything more McKenna'ish?

OK silly to take inspiration from a fictional person - and there are lots of real people out there who can attest to the efficacy of Paul's method. But I cant identify with them the way I can with Alice.

So I am not going to worry about the freaky side of control and I will continue to do what works for me. So meditation gets a big thumbs up as a way to help even if it doesnt work for everyone.

Tony's sister is dreadfully unhappy at the moment and has a BIG weight problem. I have given her the link to the meditation site. I hope she will look at it because I do feel she needs some major stress relief systems or she will go under.

Now am I being (as I would like to think) a caring person trying to help or an incurable busy body who cant keep her nose out of other peoples business. I feel good when I am in a caring - role and I think I am good at it.It was one of the things I identified I wanted to do more of. So I will assume I am being caring and continue to try to help Margaret.

Anyway I am now feeling properly hungry so I must stop and go and eat.