Day 25

How many times are we blind to the good in front of us because we're looking past it for something better? It's like watching the railroad track your entire life, waiting for a train to come in and never realizing that you're sitting smack in the middle of the splendid Grand Central Station. Take a second look at your goals. Are they building on the good already in your life? Are you taking full advantage of the strengths you already have? Is it worth giving up what you have for what you might have? In many cases, the answer is yes. To that we say "Go for it!" with all the enthusiasm we can muster. Those are the meaningful goals. If the answer is no, try reworking your goals to include ones that complement your present life rather than substitute for it. Whatever the answer is for you, we could all use a little more appreciation for the pieces of silver in our lives.

Spark people as ever bang on the mark. I think my goals ARE building on the good in my life.....but it is always good to be prompted to think and review things.

Yetsreday went well for food and exercise - although I am disappointed that last night when I clocked up a cumulative total of 100 hours on the wii fit I didnt get a fanfare!

Food was not brilliant but was OK. I didnt eat dinner as slowly as I should have done. I still have the problem that I start well early in the day and it all goes to pot when I get home from work. But I am tired, and still very emotionally fragile. Anthony sent me the text of the service last night and I ended up in tears again. And we also went to her flat last night to do the last bits of clearing up.

I need to contact a lot of people again to sort out issues with the estate. I want to write to people but with a 2 day postal strike starting tomorrow I may have to make some phone calls instead - and as one of the calls will be to nPower................

I've made a good start today.I've clocked up just under 20 minutes on the wii fit (step plus and muscle workouts) I've emptied the dishwasher and will put some laundry in to wash before I got to work. Disappointingly I have had breakfast and still feel hungry. It must be emotional - but I don't have the reserves to deal with the emotion so I am sure I will end up eating

I am coping with work OK although still very tired. At the moment all that is keeping me going is the thought of a week of Most Haunted Live starting on Saturday. OK I will be tired but who cares. And of coure the holiday.

I MUST mention the ridiculous situation I am in with my agency. They have requested my degree certificate. and I dont have a clue where it is. At the moment I dont have the energy to try and find it - although maybe the sorting out I will do to find it will be useful. I am so angry about it becasue it is a piece of bureaucratic nonsense. The only way to be registered with the RPSGB is to have passed a degree. Why the f**k do the agency need to see my degree certificate? I suppose I can understand why in one way - but it doesn't say a lot for their opinion of the Pharm Socs processes. Last nght my FP status ranted about this and said if they insisted I woull be happy to leave the agency and look for other work streams. The thought hadn't been in my mind before that - and it was a bit of bravado on my part. I am now wondering if there is a grain of truth in it and maybe at the time of HUGE change I am being given a sign that my time with the agency is over. Yesterday I also founf myself wondering if my mobile contract was a waste now I no longer have to ring Edna or ring people on her behalf. The thought came to me that I may need it for business purposes. I saw yself ringing local community pharmacies to see if they want a locum. And that was before my FB rant. I need to think and meditate