Trying to inject positivity

My aim this week according to my FB status yesterday was to stay positive and have a good week. It failed at the first hurdle. yesterday was dire. Well no not dire but it was the sort of day where if it could wrong it did. And it was rounded off by a disgruntled Tony coming to bed after a not getting a single call during his time logged on declaring he's fed up and thinks he is going to quit. Like Steve ( from whom I have heard nothing since his minor meltdown on Friday night) I am sure he will bounce back. But why do I feel I have to try and solve their problems ? Its making me feel awful that I can't as if I am failing them in some way. But NONE of the issues causing problems are under my control at all. So I really am being ridiculous. Margaret is also having problems. Betty took a turn for the worse last night although she has improved a bit. But David doesn't know what to do for the best and Margaret is moaning about his bad mood. In his shoes I'd be a basket case. Today is the anniversary of my diagnosis. I forgot that when I posted my positivity status yesterday - but I really DO have a lot to be positive about. But I am currently mulling over whether I should continue at the hospice. I am finding all the travel involved with it so tiring.To be honest what I want to do is tell them I won't be back in until after the wedding just to give myself a break from the driving. It will also enable me to get to Brenda's funeral and show some support for Brenda and H. But if I leave the hospice I won;t be giving reiki much. For someone who is supposed to be aiming for positivity there is a lot of negativity around. I need to deal with that. Just not sure how. But exercise, water and eating have all been going the wrong way over the past few days - and I know I need to get on top of things. Its the feeling of lack of control again. I need to remind myself I am in control of my life.