I weighed myself yesterday - and I can at least say my weight is stable. Thats good . Not putting on weight is good - and I can accept that as a starting point. Now all I have to do is adjust things a little so I start to lose.
Tuning in , physically I am OK - maybe a bit bloated. I am also still half asleep. Emotionally determined probably best described how I feel. Thought or question is how to make the most productive use of today.
Yesterday was Sheila's birthday and Tony had forgotten. However once we had been reminded it was amazingly easy to get going to get a card and some flowers and to pop over. There were no grumbles from Tony at all. She was out when we got there so we went to Margaret's for a bit then all went down together.
I have no idea yet what I am going to do today, whether it will be productive or not, or even if I will do any significant exercise. I am staring at 2 bills that need to be paid and I know I need to deal with some other paperwork issues so I may do those then just chill for the rest of the day. I think at the moment sleepiness is over writing determined!
Tuesday, 12 April 2011
Monday, 11 April 2011
That Monday morning feeling
First things first lets tune in. Physically I am tired , my throat aches and feels a bit raspy, I am aware of a slight bloated feeling, but I am not hungry. Emotionally I am frustrated about the lack of progress with my voice - its not really improving and I am concerned about it. Thought it I have nothing I MUST do today - so I can do what I WANT to do . If that means taking a positive decision to do nothing then so be it.
Yesterday I went for a walk in the par round the lake and I took the long route to the lake rather than the more direct one.
I am doing better with eating slowly - but yesterday during the game I kept sucking sweets in an attempt to ease my throat so I could talk. I thinks that is why I feel a bit bloated. Also yesterday Gill had Pepsi Max. No sugar - but I don't the caffeine would have done me much good. I am doing better with eating what I want too. Mindless snacking is rare. I do think before I eat now.
I still haven't conquered water consumption when I am out of the house. yesterday evening I intended to refill my glass with water - but when Gill saw I was going to the kitchen she assumed I wanted more Pepsi and told me where to find it. Why didn't I just get myself water anyway? Something to think about.............
I still haven't weighed myself again. I keep putting it off with the excuse that I have always drunk a fair amount - do I drink the water in the mornings to avoid stepping on the scale? Would I believe the weight anyway or would I be mentally thinking I've drunk a pint of water so thats at least a pound of weight I can ignore?
Oh what con men we weight watchers are - looking for any excuse to either avoid or invalidate a weigh in. Masters of self deception - it makes me wonder how much I am deceiving myself about other things........................
I am going to make this a good week - and today is going to be a good day........................
Yesterday I went for a walk in the par round the lake and I took the long route to the lake rather than the more direct one.
I am doing better with eating slowly - but yesterday during the game I kept sucking sweets in an attempt to ease my throat so I could talk. I thinks that is why I feel a bit bloated. Also yesterday Gill had Pepsi Max. No sugar - but I don't the caffeine would have done me much good. I am doing better with eating what I want too. Mindless snacking is rare. I do think before I eat now.
I still haven't conquered water consumption when I am out of the house. yesterday evening I intended to refill my glass with water - but when Gill saw I was going to the kitchen she assumed I wanted more Pepsi and told me where to find it. Why didn't I just get myself water anyway? Something to think about.............
I still haven't weighed myself again. I keep putting it off with the excuse that I have always drunk a fair amount - do I drink the water in the mornings to avoid stepping on the scale? Would I believe the weight anyway or would I be mentally thinking I've drunk a pint of water so thats at least a pound of weight I can ignore?
Oh what con men we weight watchers are - looking for any excuse to either avoid or invalidate a weigh in. Masters of self deception - it makes me wonder how much I am deceiving myself about other things........................
I am going to make this a good week - and today is going to be a good day........................
Saturday, 9 April 2011
That Saturday morning feeling
Normally on Saturday mornings people feel 'weee its the weekend lets relax and have fun' I am so tired from my busy 2 days all I am thinking is 'Have I really got the energy to anything?' But my slient musings as I feed the cats and sort out the dishwahser have produced a useful piece of self knowledge. I am really onlt 'tuning in' in the morning - and I think I need to tune in more often'
So lets start by tuning in right now.
I am tired, and still rather bunged up from the cold. I don't feel really hungry at the moment. Emotionally I am content. My thought is that I must get to grips with my eating and weight issues now my other issues are more settled.
Yesterday I went to Solihull for my induction at the hospice. I went early and did some shopping in Mell Square then walked from Mell Square to the hospice - then of course walked back after my interview. I decided the walk would be better for me and the extra car parking charge wouldn't be a massive hit. I am glad I did it - but I was SO glad I didnt have to do anything else for the rest of the day - or for a couple of days if I am honest. But the shopping trip gave me a jolt. I went into M and S and tried on a size 18 top and size 20 trousers. They were not even CLOSE to fitting. I didn;t realise M and S sizes were so skinny compared with other shops. It was a downer - especially the top. I would have needed a size 24 - and they don;t do them. But I can get into a size 16 top from Evans. But it has got me back to tinking about my size issues - hence my thoughts this morning,
May 4th will be my first working day at the hospice. I will be a proper reiki practitioner at last. I set that date to make sure I really was fit ( and because I accidently booked myself to work ot ROH one Wednesday!) It feels good to have finally made it.
Because I was out my water drinking went right down, and when I got home I was so tired I couldn't be bothered. That also affected my eating yesterday. Biscuits, Tortilla chips and chocolates :-(. The memory of that is what made me realise I don;t tune in more than once a day. And I must do it more often. I must get into the habit of carrying water with me in future.
I made a good choice for tea tho. As it was so warm I suggested salad - but I could tell Tony wasn't keen. He opted for ravioli. I did him ravioli and myself salad and we both had a grilled potato waffle. I needed the cripsiness. So tinned tuna, lettuce beetroot and a raw carrot plus the waffle was my dinner - and I am quite pleased with myself. I really enjoyed it. I have lots of vegetables in the rack that I must cook and/or use over the weekend. I think some carrot soup could be on the menu! It will be good to do some cooking anyway.
To weigh or not to weigh that is the question? Also how much exercise should I start adding in? Now my spiritual exercises are sorted my physical ones need to be added in. I want to get back to exercising before I go to work. But I think my eating is probably the most important thing to get control of - hence tuning in is going to be my main focus for a few days. I am still exercising with house work - and I may well take a walk in the park today as the weather is so wonderful. Workouts can be added in later.
So lets start by tuning in right now.
I am tired, and still rather bunged up from the cold. I don't feel really hungry at the moment. Emotionally I am content. My thought is that I must get to grips with my eating and weight issues now my other issues are more settled.
Yesterday I went to Solihull for my induction at the hospice. I went early and did some shopping in Mell Square then walked from Mell Square to the hospice - then of course walked back after my interview. I decided the walk would be better for me and the extra car parking charge wouldn't be a massive hit. I am glad I did it - but I was SO glad I didnt have to do anything else for the rest of the day - or for a couple of days if I am honest. But the shopping trip gave me a jolt. I went into M and S and tried on a size 18 top and size 20 trousers. They were not even CLOSE to fitting. I didn;t realise M and S sizes were so skinny compared with other shops. It was a downer - especially the top. I would have needed a size 24 - and they don;t do them. But I can get into a size 16 top from Evans. But it has got me back to tinking about my size issues - hence my thoughts this morning,
May 4th will be my first working day at the hospice. I will be a proper reiki practitioner at last. I set that date to make sure I really was fit ( and because I accidently booked myself to work ot ROH one Wednesday!) It feels good to have finally made it.
Because I was out my water drinking went right down, and when I got home I was so tired I couldn't be bothered. That also affected my eating yesterday. Biscuits, Tortilla chips and chocolates :-(. The memory of that is what made me realise I don;t tune in more than once a day. And I must do it more often. I must get into the habit of carrying water with me in future.
I made a good choice for tea tho. As it was so warm I suggested salad - but I could tell Tony wasn't keen. He opted for ravioli. I did him ravioli and myself salad and we both had a grilled potato waffle. I needed the cripsiness. So tinned tuna, lettuce beetroot and a raw carrot plus the waffle was my dinner - and I am quite pleased with myself. I really enjoyed it. I have lots of vegetables in the rack that I must cook and/or use over the weekend. I think some carrot soup could be on the menu! It will be good to do some cooking anyway.
To weigh or not to weigh that is the question? Also how much exercise should I start adding in? Now my spiritual exercises are sorted my physical ones need to be added in. I want to get back to exercising before I go to work. But I think my eating is probably the most important thing to get control of - hence tuning in is going to be my main focus for a few days. I am still exercising with house work - and I may well take a walk in the park today as the weather is so wonderful. Workouts can be added in later.
Friday, 8 April 2011
A 'wow' moment
Yesterday was my busiest day since my operation. I went over to the hospice to shadow another therapist and learn my way round their bit, I went from there to ROH and did 4 hours work, and then we went to the Witch and didn't get back home till midnight.
Being busy help stop snacking - and I did not go overboard on the inevitable goodies at ROH. I al;so kept up with my water intake where ever I was (including the witch)
This morning tuning in I feel tired due to lack of sleep (thank you cats for getting me up too early) and have a strange muscle pain in my right thigh. I first became aware of it while driving home last night. It seems to be the same pain I sometimes get overnight . No idea what it is but I must keep an eye on it. Emotionally I am content. Thought is ' Things are going well - how can I keep up the momentum'
The wow moment was while I was at the hospice. The therapist I was shadowing does reiki and other therapies and was doing a second session with one gentleman. She asked me to join in the with the reiki and to concentrate on on his side where he was experiencing some discomfort. Afterwards he was really pleased because the discomfort was much better after treatment - and he was trying to work out was it because the reiki really HAD done something or was it all in his mind. This was a wow for 2 reasons. It is always amazing when a patient reports an immediate effect. But in this case he obviously hadn't had the same experience with Wendy's reiki. He commented how hot my hands were - a phenomenon he obviously hadn't felt from Wendy. It is always great when I get confirmation that I am having real effects. I think Wendy may have been a a bit miffed though, I hope not.
Work was OK. I had an 'interview' for the bank post - and that is now one step further forward. There is a small chance they will also accept one of my two recent CRB checks instead of doing another one.
I really am very tired today - and I am glad I have nothing much booked for the next few days. But my stamina does seem to be improving.
I have to go to the hospice again today to have my induction with Jean - and I am going to combine it with a trip to Mell Square to do some shopping. But apart from that I am not going to push myself too hard
Being busy help stop snacking - and I did not go overboard on the inevitable goodies at ROH. I al;so kept up with my water intake where ever I was (including the witch)
This morning tuning in I feel tired due to lack of sleep (thank you cats for getting me up too early) and have a strange muscle pain in my right thigh. I first became aware of it while driving home last night. It seems to be the same pain I sometimes get overnight . No idea what it is but I must keep an eye on it. Emotionally I am content. Thought is ' Things are going well - how can I keep up the momentum'
The wow moment was while I was at the hospice. The therapist I was shadowing does reiki and other therapies and was doing a second session with one gentleman. She asked me to join in the with the reiki and to concentrate on on his side where he was experiencing some discomfort. Afterwards he was really pleased because the discomfort was much better after treatment - and he was trying to work out was it because the reiki really HAD done something or was it all in his mind. This was a wow for 2 reasons. It is always amazing when a patient reports an immediate effect. But in this case he obviously hadn't had the same experience with Wendy's reiki. He commented how hot my hands were - a phenomenon he obviously hadn't felt from Wendy. It is always great when I get confirmation that I am having real effects. I think Wendy may have been a a bit miffed though, I hope not.
Work was OK. I had an 'interview' for the bank post - and that is now one step further forward. There is a small chance they will also accept one of my two recent CRB checks instead of doing another one.
I really am very tired today - and I am glad I have nothing much booked for the next few days. But my stamina does seem to be improving.
I have to go to the hospice again today to have my induction with Jean - and I am going to combine it with a trip to Mell Square to do some shopping. But apart from that I am not going to push myself too hard
Thursday, 7 April 2011
Back to work
This morning I am preparing for a busy day. I am going to the hospice to shadow another complementary practitioner this morning, then this afternoon I am working from 1.00 until 5.00. This evening we are going to the Witch.
So I am up early, and am concentrating on my spiritual exercises first. I also need to print off a time sheet, ring and check it is still ok for me to shadow Wendy, ,eat and, get dressed. Anything else is an unnecessary distraction.
Yesterday exercise was shopping with Steve - Sainsbury, Aldi , Pet supermarket and the jewllers to repair my pendulum. Drinking water was good, slow eating was ok ish but if I was writing a school report it would say could try harder.
Tuning in this morning I realise feel a bit bloated - and I am not sure why. I am hungry tho. Emotionally I am enthused and excited about the day ahead. Thought or question is how will I cope at work. I need to visualise it all going really well.
Yesterday I had one pleasant surprise. The first sound I heard from Tony yesterday was him blowing his nose. I realised he had come down with a cold and my heart sank. He tends to be grumpy when he is ill. He does tend to the 'manflu' syndrome But to my surprise he said nothing to me about the cold and seemed fairly chipper. A bit later his FB status was a comment that he had a dry throat and sniffles - but he was not going to let it get him down. The only slight grump came when he had to decide if he wanted to go to the game at Gill and Darren's. His only concern was whether he was infectious - and it was clear he really was up for going despite the cold. This is such a contrast to how he is normally. He continued to make his normal quota of drinks through the day, and stayed very upbeat. He seems to have caught positive thinking off me as well as my cold.
So I am up early, and am concentrating on my spiritual exercises first. I also need to print off a time sheet, ring and check it is still ok for me to shadow Wendy, ,eat and, get dressed. Anything else is an unnecessary distraction.
Yesterday exercise was shopping with Steve - Sainsbury, Aldi , Pet supermarket and the jewllers to repair my pendulum. Drinking water was good, slow eating was ok ish but if I was writing a school report it would say could try harder.
Tuning in this morning I realise feel a bit bloated - and I am not sure why. I am hungry tho. Emotionally I am enthused and excited about the day ahead. Thought or question is how will I cope at work. I need to visualise it all going really well.
Yesterday I had one pleasant surprise. The first sound I heard from Tony yesterday was him blowing his nose. I realised he had come down with a cold and my heart sank. He tends to be grumpy when he is ill. He does tend to the 'manflu' syndrome But to my surprise he said nothing to me about the cold and seemed fairly chipper. A bit later his FB status was a comment that he had a dry throat and sniffles - but he was not going to let it get him down. The only slight grump came when he had to decide if he wanted to go to the game at Gill and Darren's. His only concern was whether he was infectious - and it was clear he really was up for going despite the cold. This is such a contrast to how he is normally. He continued to make his normal quota of drinks through the day, and stayed very upbeat. He seems to have caught positive thinking off me as well as my cold.
Tuesday, 5 April 2011
Setting up for the day ahead
'Failing to plan means you are planning fail'
It sounds a bit trite - but its very true. using this blog to help me plan my day is a tool to help me succeed. Also by blogging I visualise what I am going to do - and as long I visualise things going well that helps me succeed.
Yesterday wasn't a brilliant day. I started eating too fast again so today I must get back to where I was with that. I drank lots of water, my walk round the lake was very good and I did some very helpful thinking as I walked.
Tuning in this morning I am still a bit sleepy - but I am hungry - and a bit thirsty despite water and tea. I still have the remnants of my cold but otherwise physically I feel ok. Emotionally I feel upbeat and positive. Thought is I want to dive into my new spiritual routine and do some work on my portfolio. So I am very motivated.
I am going swimming later with Margaret. I am going to do my new spiritual routine in a bit (after breakfast) and then work on my portfolio.
It sounds a bit trite - but its very true. using this blog to help me plan my day is a tool to help me succeed. Also by blogging I visualise what I am going to do - and as long I visualise things going well that helps me succeed.
Yesterday wasn't a brilliant day. I started eating too fast again so today I must get back to where I was with that. I drank lots of water, my walk round the lake was very good and I did some very helpful thinking as I walked.
Tuning in this morning I am still a bit sleepy - but I am hungry - and a bit thirsty despite water and tea. I still have the remnants of my cold but otherwise physically I feel ok. Emotionally I feel upbeat and positive. Thought is I want to dive into my new spiritual routine and do some work on my portfolio. So I am very motivated.
I am going swimming later with Margaret. I am going to do my new spiritual routine in a bit (after breakfast) and then work on my portfolio.
Monday, 4 April 2011
AaaaCHOO
My cold took me over yesterday but I still managed to do 10 minutes free step - first time in 5 days I have used the wii fit.
The eating slowly and drinking water went well.
This morning I have done a lot of spiritual development taks and housework and not had time to eat - but I haven't felt hungry. My cold is getting better, I feel better and I am planning on taking a walk round the lake for the first time in weeks.
Tuning in I feel OK despite the cold. My emotions are positive and my thought is I have to develop a positive spiritual routine just as I am developing positive new eating patterns and exercise routines.
Today I am going to put some time in on my portfolio. Tomorrow I am going swimming with Maggie,
The eating slowly and drinking water went well.
This morning I have done a lot of spiritual development taks and housework and not had time to eat - but I haven't felt hungry. My cold is getting better, I feel better and I am planning on taking a walk round the lake for the first time in weeks.
Tuning in I feel OK despite the cold. My emotions are positive and my thought is I have to develop a positive spiritual routine just as I am developing positive new eating patterns and exercise routines.
Today I am going to put some time in on my portfolio. Tomorrow I am going swimming with Maggie,
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